I Fought the Law ... an' the Law Won

BLISTERING BLUE BARNACLES: What manner of momentual madness is this?! Screengrab

Something popped up on Facebook, as it does during a 21-day Covid-19 lockdown between fitness circuits around the garden and 24/7 television news, that linked to a petition on www.gopetition.com titled "Please Let Kouga Residents Surf".

Say whaaat? I took a double take. What in the name of linear lunacy is this!? Especially after the news that the first Covid-19 infection has been reported in St Francis. The post said:

"Let the locals surf! #Lockdown #petition #covid19 #Coronavirus #corona #surfer #surfing #WSL After a few days of perfect #JBay and one arrested surfer at #supertubes Jeffrey’s Bay, locals are squirming, please help with your signature. We need a few thousand!"

I followed the link. The 'target' of the petition was the Kouga Executive Mayor and Mayoral committee. It had 571 views, with 48 signatures. Not a big hit rate. I wonder why. The petition calls for authorities to rescind the surfing ban because it "can easily be conducted in a safe manner that does not increase the risk of viral spread" but "promotes the health and well-being of participants".

YES, LOCK DOWN: What part of lockdown do you not understand my bru? Photo Unsplash

The petition went on to list these healthy anti-Covid-19 benefits:

• Cardiovascular exercise buoys the immune system, and experts recommend aerobic exercises as a preventative measure.
• Deep breathing and holding one’s breath increases the elasticity of the lungs, and, in turn, the ability to cope with upper respiratory disease.
• Spending time outside breathing clean, fresh air is also expert recommended as a prophylactic measure against COVID-19.
• Submersion in cool or cold water has multiple health benefits including: reduced inflammation, tension, fatigue, memory loss, negative mood states, significantly increased vigor-activity scores, pain relief, and improved general well-being.

Of course, the post has copped more vitriol than hot oil poured down the ramparts of castles in at least five medieval sieges, although the source behind the petition said the request came with "utmost respect for the rule of law and the severity of the situation".

SURF ISOLATION: Dr Joseph Hardeman is going to be glad for the lockdown. Instagram screengrab

It's been a weird old Day 4 of the ZA Corona Virus lockdown. This morning, I saw an article by Craig Jarvis on Beachgrit about a doctor and big wave surfer from the US Joseph Hardenman who surfed Supertubes twice on Friday after the lockdown began on Thursday at midnight. He had a short dawnie, but it was a bit devils windish, so he surfed later. Both times not a soul was in the water with him. He scored it all to himself.

Of course, he is now the most wanted man in JBay, despite protestations that he didn't realise, that he had just arrived in the country, blah blah blah.

Actually, that's not true. As of yesterday, he is the third most wanted man in JBay after two young surfers were arrested for surfing and loaded into a Jeffrey's Bay paddy wagon (see right). According to Jarvi in another article, they were given the option of six months jail or a fine of R5,000.

Conditions were not exactly firing, so it was quite an expensive surf. Surf-starved surfers now hate your guts, and you're down five grand. Brigadier Vish Naidoo of the SA Police Services has confirmed that two men in their early 20s were arrested for contravening the Disaster Management Act. The hardy bunch of grizzled locals of Kouga are not happy with these three gentlemen, judging by posts seething with antagonism. The unhappy trio can only hope for an extension to the lockdown, but there's a catch. The longer the locals wait before they can surf, the grumpier they'll be.